and yes i still love him and want him back but he with someone else and 4 days after saying he got new girl he told me to move on and let him be.i wonder what wrong i did.i still miss him alot and yearn for him and i was loyal to him whole time we dated.it hurts still and i want him backIm in rebound relationship with a man whose behaviour and temperament is like of my exwhat i do now..help me out thanks in advance , I need help and advise. I strongly suggest you let her think what she wants while you find someone who appreciates and values you. Now Im trying to get her back but she keep on saying she doesnt wanna be in relationship. For example, if you go into this and literally think to yourself: You know what, he doesnt owe me a thing. I would suggest that you spend some time working on yourself, spend time with your friends and family especially when he does get back. You can do this! While I cant always answer everyone I try my very best to. What does this mean?) I did the begging and pleading, appealed that i put so much effort for us and for her. Things got hectic with my daughter, her fiance and child moving in with us with my 2 sons who also live in my home. They may not think about them as strongly and frequently as you think about your ex (especially right after the breakup), but they certainly dont erase dumpees from their memory. Or should I try to reconnect and sort things out with her.. He hasnt replied since and its been 2 weeks hes really stubborn and is very protective of his pride. The BEST THING YOU CAN DO IS SUCK IT UP AND PUSH FORWARD! If he contacts me then he contacts me. Women who often visit this site message me asking something like, My ex boyfriend doesnt seem to be affected at all by the breakup. Strategies to overcome a narcissistic co-parent include . Eventually she got tired of me. Unfortunately, you likely won't get him back this way unless your ex gets hurt so badly, he abandons his pride and finds alternative ways to contact you. He broke up 3 weeks ago. The odd thing Ive put on social media hes never viewed. Firstly, the no contact rule is only step one in the process. It wants what it wants and eventually it wore my pride down and a few days later I sent that message. So, there is no use getting all depressed over a strategy that is literally at its beginning. Hit the gym, get new clothes, meditate, hang out with friends who make you feel awesome 5. The first thing I do is answer my coaching clients (since its common for them to have a lot of questions.) These things wont exactly cause your ex to delete you from existence, but they will make your ex lose respect for you and think about you much less and in worse light after your ex has gotten space. Youd been with your ex for months if not years, so there are a lot of memories and emotions at play here. What did you do then? Just think of it like an addictionthey are using us and they are the only ones who can change that behaviour. Remember, the line between love and hate is very thin. If for the dumpee, the best way to heal and move on is to do no contact (which I agree, given the phrase out of sight, out of mind is certainly the best way to heal) why wouldnt the same apply for the dumper? Be flawlessly polite and kind with all contact, but NEVER beg for your ex back. what should I do? The ultimate purpose of the no contact rule. Ailie, I would suggest that you go a full 45 days NC and when he does come back that you explain this is the last time you are willing to make things work and if he leaves again you are happy to start moving on with your life. Such people probably dont remember that one person they hooked up with once. Once you've gotten your ex to refriend you, go ahead and ask her to meet up with you. If you were left for someone else, NC is even that much better for you. Of course, no contact works, don't contact him for 30 days before reaching out to him again. Is she still gonna think about me? We were trying for a baby and had been together years. When your ex texts during no contact, you aren't aware of what their intention might be. My ex left me 3 months ago, she went into a rebount relation ship with someboy who is not in the country anymore, they meet after the break up for 7 weeks, this guy is from malasya and he have returned to his country already. I have seen a lot of people with that attitude fail but I have also seen a lot of people with that attitude succeed. The relationship was great. In that case, you should carry on with no contact and continue to detach and feel better. Then said bye. There are two main reasons why your ex (who consistently treated you poorly), unfollowed you on social media: He just can't. He's hurt either by you or by having to see your photos. How are things between you and your ex now? He needs to see that you mean what you say and are willing to move on from him as you are allowing this pattern to continue means that you will never progress in your relationship or life. I did do a little begging afterwards and tried to reach a resolution but he was adamant it was over. Cant understand what is going on. Sometimes it is up to you to reach out and form that emotional attachment. Obviously she was very upset about the whole not being contacted situation. I feel that women often have an advantage over men because women are constantly talking to other women about their feelings. Its been 5 months and no contact. Its been almost 2wks now. These things are completely out of your control. If he's tired of being with you, then doing no contact is your way of respecting his decision. What we are going to be talking about in this article is going to be a little involved and will require a bit of foundation on your part (i.e. If anything, they are going to use you to get over you, and then discard you when they meet someone else. but I will appreciate your opinion about my story. hi Lily, you broke NC once you answered his text, you need to go 30 days SOLID no speaking with your ex to complete a successful NC and in that time you work on yourself. I replied again a few times apologising saying she didnt have to accept my apology but just know I was truly sorry. Or it definitely etely over for him? What we are going to be getting into now is the actual ignoring part. He or she wont forget you by dating someone else either. I never told him this. If your ex fails on his or her quest to find happiness, your ex will be forced to self-reflect and may even return to you. They are invested in avoiding their feelings.especially intimate ones like empathy, caring, love. (And I hadn't even made any move online to suggest how I felt or that anything had changed in my life.) Well, like I explained above. Best read since Lord of the rings was released. Her reasons for the break up (She is 24 and im 30, she wanted to live her life and she thought that not having the same sense of humor was important, she is from the Uk, I am from Venezuela, obvuisly if you like people from different countries there is always gonna be differences in that), I was the chef of the house, i took care from our 3 cats all the time, cleaning and helping at home, i know im not perfect but i concider that i was a total gentleman with her most of the time, even after the break up she told me (for much you have been the best boyfriend that i ever had, and I know i will get karma for leaving you, but i dont fell the same passion anymore, (honey moon period was over and she could not handle it)), we were together for 2 years and 6 months, and we lived together for 1 and 4 months. In this case, nothing will ever help you see your ex in a better light. That probably doesnt make you feel much better, but you need to know that dumpers dont always come back. If you don't unfriend your ex from facebook, you are going to end up looking at their profile sooner or later. Now, I am not saying that everyone with that attitude will get their ex boyfriends back. I am doing no contact but he had already been pretty silent. But you shes right, you cant do that until you figure yourself out. They meet someone new all the time, so they can actually forget someone they didnt care about. She stopped for a while and started to gave time for me. But if your ex doesnt return, he or she will probably think about you and other romantic partners significantly more than now and try to figure out if any of them can help him or her cope with anxiety. You dont like the way romantic rejection feels, so you want to once again feel the way you felt when you were with your ex. What should I do? Me and my ex were only together 2 and a half months and it may sound stupid to some people I get that, but in that time Ive never felt such a strong connection with someone as I did with her, it felt like we had known each other years. Dumpees assume that dumpers are coming back around, but most of the time, dumpers are showing interest and expressing themselves strongly only because they want reassurance and help. In other words, in that massive guide I actually recommend that you are the first one to make contact with your ex after the no contact period. For example, I remember when I was younger and a girl I was falling for wouldnt respond to my texts I logged on to Facebook and looked at her profile to see if she was online. Towards the beginning of this guide I went on this whole rant about how the no contact rule can still be working even if your ex doesnt contact you. Girls often do that when they want to have your attention. Im in not conact rule right now, respecting her decition and trying to heal my self as well. I have heard nothing. It is OK for me as I need time to trust again and want to know him better before embarking in a new relationship. 6. May I add she also had been saying to me the week we started talking normal again how we were going to visit Brazil end of the year, all the things we can do together after corona virus has ended! Your ex wanted to be independent. What often happens when people hold their feelings in? If you really think she is posting how happy she is to simply make you jealousthen youre letting her manipulate you. Ex blocked me during no contact, what does that mean 4,570 views Premiered Feb 22, 2021 87 Dislike Share Save TheTruth 1.08K subscribers 52 She's not my friend on Instagram and my page. How do I tell him all this for a second chance? But i wanted her to realise also that it would take two people to make a romantic relationship work out and as days goes by without contact, I am missing her as hell! I just want to stay alive in his memories ^^. He may discover what he actually was experiencing before when he said he was "tired of you," was just the normal up and down of relationship. The answer is quite simply yes. In the beginning he was periodically call me and text me very little now that Im at this point he has been calling me every day as often as multiple times a day. 11. Hence I feel that no-contact is more successful at helping the dumpee heal, but is less successful at helping the dumpee get the dumper back. I mentioned she had a story still on her Instagram of her ex, why did she still have it, obviously that makes me look jealous though so I wish I hadnt mentioned it, she said she didnt even realise it was there, and she hasnt watched it and its over a year old, I said she asked me to remove everything of my ex from my profile and I did when we first met (I had like 3 posts on my insta from like a year ago) as I knew how It made her feel, so how do you think it makes me feel to see that, as I still follow her. To you, its all or nothing, as there is no middle option. While I know it is a lot to read if you did take the plunge and read through it all you will have noticed that the overall ex recovery process hinges on YOU making the first move (which I plan on going into much greater detail later.). The no contact rule is meant to tap into that loss and cause an ex boyfriend to contact you but is that the true purpose of the no contact rule? On some level, he has an idea of when he thinks he can reach out. Do that by asking your ex why he or she reached out and responding appropriately. Consider this section to be your attitude adjustment when it comes to no contact. How else can you meet other interesting and more beautiful girls if you're hanging on the memory of an indecisive girl. 4. Remember, your main goal here is to get your ex back and in order to do that communication is key. He suddenly flared up and told me he does not want to have anything to do with me and he has blocked me on all social media platforms. It just so happens that the time I did look at her profile she was online and I remember I blew her phone up angry that she was ignoring me. That brings me to my next point. Take your time when it comes to responding. And then ego will get the better of him. He got angry and broke up with me. It helped me ^^ Seriously, they will sit around and cry because he didn't call or text. This may spark an interesting debate though because if an ex boyfriend is using his own silence to hurt you does it mean that he would ever consider a reconciliation? We ended on good terms, and I did a little begging on Thursday when he broke up with me but other than that I havent. Maybe it's because they want to warn their ex that they're about to disappear or maybe some people just think that you need to tell your ex that you're going to stop . He has said from beginning that he wasnot ready to committ to a relationship. His heart wants nothing more than to check up on you and see how you are doing. Sure, you wont be on your exs mind as much as you would if you annoyed your ex by begging every day. I am trying so so hard to push past my urges not to message him. Thanks. The secret subtext behind every happy birthday text from an ex is: Look at me, I'm so ~over it~ that I can wish you a "happy" day and it's totally fine! The best way I can answer whether your ex will forget about you during no contact is to say that dumpers dont forget their exes. I broke up with my girlfriend after she betrayed me by cheating and denying about it. I just wondered if there was any advice on what happens now? I dont know if many of you know this but this website wasnt actually supposed to be a blog. I just control my anxiety and she did not bother helping me get through it even if it was her fault why i developed this. I did not wanted really get committed too soon in a relationship and would have preferred to take my time too. Answering an ex during no contact: If you were too distant in the relationship Let's say that part of the reason (or maybe even the entire reason) behind why the relationship ended between you was that you neglected your partner. I was at a friends party and her sister put on their stories of them drinking and she looks so happy, is she over me? These two reasons are the only perpetrators and the main reasons why you as a dumpee may think that blocking your ex to get him back is a good idea. I have no intention of getting him back or being with him . Well, one thing that you can automatically assume is that a guy who doesnt contact you during the no contact period always has a bit of stubbornness to him. I have kids and we broke up because he couldnt see a future for us dispite saying he is in love with me, Im the one blah blah blah. The point I am trying to make here is that the more attached you are to someone the greater the chances that them ignoring you will affect you. Answer (1 of 3): I can relate to your girlfriend as I did the same thing recently with my ex. Its really driving me crazy now. I remember one time where there was someone I really wanted to talk to. What is in your control, however, are the mistakes you make after the breakup. after that called 10 minutes after she tweet: Distance makes the mind more confused, anyway later a few days back by coincidence we attent to the same event, we saw each other but we didnt say anything, even if in acouple of times we look at each other straight to the eyes in the distance but no more. She recently ended our 3yrs relationship. Which is fine. Well, lets assume that you are embarking on a 30 day no contact rule and lets say that after 21 days your ex boyfriend hasnt gotten in touch with you. I wanted to impose the No Contact rule but eventually I broke it. What Happens When You Ignore A Breadcrumber? Hope you get better soon. Would you like to know where I came up with that mindset? We both, at times, lied to each other when discussing being with other people (we both have now), but I still wish to continue to fight for her, despite her moving out, her not knowing what she wants and more.do I go no contact now? I think he follows my posts but never reaches out. I told him I felt hurt and I would have contacted him when I was better. You see, every day when I wake up I do one of two things. I contacted some close friends to talk to him but he said he wants nothing to do with me. Well, if the two of you just have this never ending no contact battle with one another then nothing is going to happen that could help you two reunite. Beware of that. Everyone is saying to not text her that she has to be the one that texts back. Unfortunately, there is no right way to stay in your exs life and win them over. Because I have literally been in that position before. No need to unfriend or block him if you take these steps. The no contact rule was born from this type of thinking. Well, you probably threw a tantrum. So whether I tell you that your ex will forget about you or remember you forever, bear in mind that my words wont change the outcome. A mans heart is stubborn. Should I contact him after the no contact period?. Recently I called him during the day but he didnt pick and so I decided to send him a message enquiring why he was not picking my calls. While those emotions may be negative they are still emotions and if you play your cards right you can turn them in your favor. However, the no contact rule also uses something else as equally powerful as silence to its advantage, the power of ignoring. 5. So, if the longest you've gone in a year, curiosity is likely to get the better of him by, for example,rel 18 months. 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